Saturday, November 21, 2009

Day Twentyone - Reflection

Not a Nano focused blog today followers. A small mention right at the end.

As I write this I’m waiting for my cousin to arrive to hang out for the evening. Today marks two years since her dad (my uncle) died. We got together this time last year, except we all meet up for morning tea at my parents. This year she’s coming to mine to just hang out and take the time to reflect on what her Dad meant to her, and to the both of us.

For me I lost an Uncle who was tough man, he’d lead a very colourful life, but you always knew that should you be in any trouble he have your back. He’d appear as the muscle in a situation if it required it, and gave me an admiration for tattoos as more than ‘tough stickers’ and items bikers have, but works of art someone has taken the time to create.

I remember my Dad telling him I was gay (My dad wasn’t keen on the news at all) and I recall him (My uncle) being a little taken back, as he simply assumed as most people did that one of the four boys I shared a flat with was my boyfriend! However he was accepting of it, and in a way helped with a situation I faced at the time

But overall my Uncle was a good dad to his three children. He was both their father and their mother, as his wife pissed off with someone else leaving him with three kinds the youngest not even one at the time. But he stepped up or as he would say it ‘manned up’ took on the responsibility of both parents and raised his children to the best of his ability.

My youngest cousin is gay also, and he came out to me quite a while ago now, but asked that I not tell a sole, as he was worried how his dad would react. I tried to let him know that if he was accepting of me, he’d be accepting of him, but his argument was, ‘All men love lesbians, they aren’t as keen on gay men’ (Unfortunately we live in a society that isn’t accepting of anything that isn’t the norm, yet they can’t give a definitive answer as to what is normal!) He did eventually tell his Dad he was gay, about 10 months before he died. I went with him the night he came out, for moral support, and things went fine. My Cousin and my Uncle hugged for quite a long time, there were some tears from both, as my cousins expressed he was afraid to tell him, which made my Uncle emotional telling him to never be afraid to say or tell him anything. It was a nice evening and ended with a lot of alcoholic beverages being consumed!

So as I wait for my Cousin to arrive, I’ve found some old home movies that contain her Dad, and if she’s up for it we’ll watch some of them this evening, if not, then we’ll watch what ever she chooses (A trip to the video store is on the cards) Or we may just spend the evening out the back cooking sausages on the BBQ in the soaring heat, and reflect on the good times, the ones that make us smile and most importantly laugh.

On to totally different topic. I managed to punch put 2K of words today, I’m still ahead by about 400 words for the word limit I should be by day 21. Nine days and counting. I plan on getting past that finish line complete with 50,000 words.

That’s all I’ve got.

** Quickly uploading this while my Cousin is on the phone to her boyfriend saying goodnight to her kids. I didn't get a chance before she arrived at 6pm.

1 comment:

ScoMan said...

Your uncle sounds like he was a good man. Open minded and accepting which are two qualities not always found in Australian males. Especially those with tattoos.

He sounds like he was one of those guys who's hard on the outside but a softy to those he loves.

I hope you enjoyed the evening with your cousin.